2.12.2005

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I am sure I have seasonal affective disorder. I have abundant disorders. I can post a list if needed. I need sunlight like a reptile. Give me 25 years -- I'll be in Florida complaining about the enormous insects.

What is the deal with moods? Some people are cheerful all the time, others brooding. Some of us shift like a dancer’s steps. I am one of the moodiest people I know. I wouldn’t want to live with me.

Someone once told me that there is more value in loving people when you don’t feel like it than when emotions easily lead you there. It’s more intentional, and more of a self-offering. Ironically, the more we invest in others like that, the more we feel drawn to serve them. A bit like owning a home vs. renting a place. We are not just self. We are these others. Perhaps that’s why an offence against another is more like a self-destructive act than not.

1 comment:

Jeanne said...

I prefer roller coasters to merry-go-rounds, as a film granny said in "Parenting". As long as you can live with yourself you're all right.

I'm feeling down myself, and sunshine does wonders for me, but I don't think the lack thereof is the problem. These are hard times, it seems, and I see it reflected everywhere.
Take care.
-Jeanne