Ireland's Poet

Had I the heaven's embroidered cloths,
Enwrought with golden and silver light,
The blue and the dim and the dark cloths,
Of night and light and the half-light,
I would spread the cloths under your feet;
But I, being poor, have only my dreams;
I have spread my dreams under your feet;
Tread softly because you tread on my dreams.

William Butler Yeats

A Post about Posting

Realized lately that many people have strong negative feelings about social networking.  It has only occurred to me in observing this that I am not one of those people.  I have re-started this poor excuse for a blog, tweet most days, and fiddle with facebook on weekends.  I am apparently comfortable sharing personal information via all three.  I think I am trying (without really thinking about it) to force myself into living and thinking with consistency.  I don't want to be a different person depending on where I am or who I'm with.  I don't mean that people who avoid social networking are inconsistent, I am just realizing my own tendency to pretend, and this is one way to do something about it.

Tweets

Not original ideas, but I'd like to believe these are original ways of expressing (perhaps) old ideas. The following is my history of "original" tweets from the past year since I joined Twitter. This is an attempt to encourage new Twitter contributors.

Aversion to reason is a most efficient atheism.

5:05 PM Mar 3rd via web

We are healed by forgiving; then our wound can be converted into strength.

8:07 AM Feb 25th via web

Granting forgiveness seems like giving our aggressor power over us, but the opposite is true. Withholding makes us slaves to bitterness.

8:06 AM Feb 25th via web

Churches are united by common beliefs, and also usually by fear of and resistance to other perspectives. Can this be healthy?

3:38 PM Feb 14th via TinyTwitter

Understanding of things that matter (meaning, people, love, value, morality, god) all involve uncertainty.

3:06 PM Jan 31st via TinyTwitter

We can't examine a person objectively to understand who they are.

3:01 PM Jan 31st via TinyTwitter

Truth: People are inherently good, sometimes in spite of, rather than because of, their religious beliefs.

6:38 PM Jan 20th via web

Religion grows up when it moves from preparing us to enter the next life, to enabling us to live each moment fully, now.

1:53 PM Nov 27th, 2009 via web

Ideas that immediately make sense don't usually make a significant difference.

10:57 AM Oct 31st, 2009 via web

Ironic: the only creatures able to truly self-reflect need to escape the same to live fully.

6:27 PM Oct 12th, 2009 via web

Faith and doubt are partners, not enemies. Faith is belief and unbelief together held in tension.

1:00 PM Oct 6th, 2009 via web

Most arguments of religious people boil down to a conclusion that the other is the real problem in the world, people who just don't get it.

9:10 AM Oct 3rd, 2009 via web

Better an honest doubt than a certain belief unexamined.

3:32 PM Oct 2nd, 2009 via web

If you're not ready to admit your doubt, I'm not interested in hearing about your faith.

5:44 AM Aug 25th, 2009 via web

I am attracted by people who seek the truth. I am frightened by those who claim to have it.

6:31 PM Aug 19th, 2009 via web

Religion is not the acceptance of certain propositions. It is openness to life change.

2:27 PM Aug 16th, 2009 via web

Not getting what I want is often good for me. The trick is not giving up on what I want altogether.

8:50 AM Aug 13th, 2009 via web

religion like medicine: well intended, can be lifesaving, but often abused, deals with symptoms vs problems & carries dangerous side effects.

2:41 PM Jul 11th, 2009 via web

It is a fearful thing to be alone with your thoughts, undistracted.

9:24 PM Jun 12th, 2009 via txt

Authentic leadership assumes willing followers. Coersion and intimidation exclude this possibility.

12:09 PM Jun 10th, 2009 via txt

We each interpret the world in a way that confirms what we already believe. It takes great courage to do otherwise.

3:37 PM Jun 6th, 2009 via txt

Religion, as a method of being good, is a deadly anesthetic.

8:14 AM May 30th, 2009 via txt

Every man is desperate to know he has what it takes. Every man suspects that he does not. We usually deny one or the other.

6:28 AM May 27th, 2009 via txt

The best way to reach a goal is not to aim directly at it, but at a greater goal beyond it.

12:47 PM May 18th, 2009 via web

The only unforgiveable sin is refusal to accept forgiveness.

8:17 AM May 14th, 2009 via txt

No one really seeks evil. We just get twisted up seeking good things in the wrong way, often as if good things are the best thing.

7:17 AM May 12th, 2009 via txt

Our self-reassurance that we are in control does nothing except numb us to amazing and unknown.

12:20 PM May 8th, 2009 via txt

Our addictions are not the problem. They are a symptom.

5:09 AM May 6th, 2009 via txt

The trap: Not that I want too much; I settle for too little.

7:17 AM Apr 29th, 2009 via web

Believing real life only begins after death keeps us selfish and irrelevant. Knowing real life is here&now helps us love people.

4:03 PM Apr 27th, 2009 via web

I have a strong faith in God, but sometimes doubt his existence. What does that mean?

7:51 AM Apr 24th, 2009 via web

Don't tell me what you believe. Show me. That's what you really believe anyway.

1:08 PM Apr 22nd, 2009 via web

If your religion causes you to sin, gouge it out.

9:50 PM Apr 21st, 2009 via txt

The interaction that disagreement requires is usually more important than the solution.

4:14 PM Apr 20th, 2009 via web

Leaping is more courageous than having no fear of the drop.

9:57 PM Apr 18th, 2009 via txt

Those that need Jesus’ teaching the most are usually those who already claim to be his followers.

7:04 AM Apr 17th, 2009 via web

Faith and doubt are not opposites.

9:09 PM Apr 15th, 2009 via txt

It's selfish to deprive someone else the opportunity to love you. Let your guard down.

9:48 AM Apr 15th, 2009 via txt

Pain and Reality

Sharon and I saw Shutter Island this weekend.

*SPOILER ALERT*
Read no further if you have plans to see this film.

The film's hero is called upon to investigate a missing prisoner situation in a high security hospital for the criminally insane. As the story advances we learn that he has experienced traumas similar to many of the institution's "patients", and his memories of these traumas seem to mingle with the histories of the residents.  It turns out that he has in fact been deluding himself; telling himself an enormous lie.  He is himself an inmate of the hospital/prison, but the memory of his crimes and the circumstances that lead to them were so intensley painful that he developed an elaborate fantasy to block them out.

This all struck me as a moderately exaggerated version of what many of us do frequently.  We fear that we can't deal with the pain of loss, disappointment, abuse, regret -- so we pretend its not there, all to our own harm.  The deadly disease is there, whether we acknowledge it or not, but the shocking reality is that we can handle the truth.  Sadly, we are often more comfortable with fantasy than the risk of finding out that this is true and dealing with the change that loss demands.

Ok With That

Reviewing my old blog posts from 5-7 years ago, I can see that my departure from a grasping after certainty has been a long time coming.  Perhaps this is nothing more unusual than a certain degree of maturity.  At least, that's what I'd like to think.  We can't control our lives as we like to imagine.  Things come at us that we can't predict.  The unknown is scary.  At some point we all need to accept this, or we layer barriers of protection around ourselves that cut us off from living fully and really loving people.

I am apparently only now learning to accept all this, although in only a limited way -- as my continued struggles with anger and escapism evidence.  I intend to keep working toward simple acceptance and enjoyment of life as much as possible, including getting rid of the things that limit that for other people.

March 30th at 9:58 AM ...

We've been busy reproducing again. My neighbor says to keep at it ... eventually we'll get it right. Made me laugh out loud, even though she was only half kidding.



Meet "Q". Quinn. Quinton Zachary. "Quinton" means "fifth child", and even though he's #6, the name for sixth (Sextus) was just too over-the-top ...

The Visionary

In a real sense, all life is interrelated. All men are caught in an inescapable network of mutuality, tied in a single garment of destiny. Whatever affects one directly affects all indirectly. I can never be what I ought to be until you are what you ought to be, and you can never be what you ought to be until I am what I ought to be. This is the interrelated structure of reality.

Martin Luther King, Jr.
The Man Who Was a Fool, Strength to Love
Atlanta, GA
February 3, 1963

Why?

That's it. Awaiting your comments.

What Do You Believe Is True Even Though You Cannot Prove It?

Great minds ponder a great question.

Warning: Hold tightly to your ears to keep your head from spinning.

The Evidence Will Show

Whilst (that’s a word -- look it up) painting dining room walls with a good friend a couple weeks ago, we were discussing “paranormal” phenomenon. He related a few recent personal stories of unexplainable happenings. For example, things he knew would happen before they did, and that knowledge somehow assisted in the development of the related events.

I recalled my experience weeks prior to 9/11/01 – not that my knowledge assisted anyone, but I have reluctantly seen this type of thing first hand. Jeanne related a story about the disappearing door. Was it really missing the first time around?

I think 99% of the time there is a rational explanation for these types of things. We are intuitively in touch with connections in our surroundings. Our minds perceive far more than we are aware of. For the sake of survival and sanity, we filter out most of what goes on around us and zero-in on what we believe relevant. This partly explains why people in crisis often describe things going in slow motion: surroundings and perceptions suddenly become more “present”. We never really forget anything. We just conserve our mental (and emotional) energy by spending it in places we believe will provide the greatest safety.

On the flip of that coin, we probably don’t pay attention to a huge amount of this sort of thing. There are times when there is absolutely no rational explanation. Something super-natural has happened. I’m one of those that believe the universe is far bigger than our instruments can measure, and I’m not referring to the literal size of the cosmos. Science itself points beyond science. I think most probably acknowledge this. After all, to believe that daily life-as-we-understand-it is all there is – that’s quite a leap of faith.

What I think is most interesting is that there seems to be just enough evidence. Just enough to either deny or believe. If you want to toss this stuff aside, it’s not so hard to do. If you look for the unexplainable (or in my case, the activity of the Creator), there’s plenty to be found.

I think it’s a shame: there are plenty of examples where we too quickly give in to either side. We don’t like to be caught with our categories down. The rationalist makes just as silly a mistake as the paranormal-addict. “There is a God! Look! I have him here in this box!” Rubbish. If there is a God, he’s far larger than our metrics in columns and rows. And he is.

Broken

Been home with the flu since mid-day yesterday. Ack. I’d forgotten how much fun it can be. Everyone in the house save my 74-year old mother-in-law, and 4-year-old daughter got socked in the gut. Little CindyLou Who wanted to climb in bed with us, but she just got, “We don’t want you to get sick, Avery.” Her answer: “Ok. I won’t.” She didn’t … at least not yet.

The place has finally settled a bit. The Christmas tree is mostly upright, walls are painted, mother-in-law has moved in. I could live without the flu, but there are worse things.

We recently acquired a photo of my father-in-law:

Don left the family when my wife was 5, and shot himself in despair after the “affair with the secretary” proved (I assume) less than fulfilling about 10 years later. What a horrible tragedy … that has lead to other tragedies. I do wish I could have a conversation with him. There’s too much that doesn’t fit. He was apparently often great as a dad, even if he had a hot temper. He’d take the family on daytrips and vacations, they decided to adopt a child together, he loved taking the family out to eat, they sang songs in the car, and got generally silly. Something of an artist, he went right up the ladder at Westinghouse. Somewhere along the line, something went wrong. I suspect it was small and slow at first, each step building on another. I may never know exactly.

Things like that seep back into my thoughts around the holidays. Life is not as it should be. The world is askew. It wouldn’t be so bad for the world to be askew, if I (we) didn’t have this sometimes-overbearing desire for things to be “right” – there is a “way things should be”, and we all know it. I suppose that’s why we get angry and frustrated when we see things go wrong, even if it doesn’t have a direct impact on us.

All this makes me think I need to keep myself in check, and figure out how to see the world as good, even though it is clearly broken in half -- kind of like a family that the father has abandoned. I need to remember that my imperfect sense of “should” probably exists because the target is real. I will give up pretending everything is ok. I will give up abandoning the world as completely lost and ruined. I need to do the difficult work of redeeming the broken-ness of the word, because the world -- that is, other people -- matter, and they are valuable. And my own brokenness is fixed as I go.

I think this is why it is a good thing to be alive.

Merry Christmas

La Fille du Fromage

Our littlest has earned a reputation as the "Cheese Girl" among her siblings for her penchant for cheddar. I found myself referring to her fondly by another blogger’s title. Cute, eh?